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Post by skysmum on Dec 30, 2018 21:38:20 GMT
Jane, i know we've spoken today but i had to acknowledge dear Squawks passing on here. No more beating yourself up about the bread, as you say he wasn't looking well before and if he enjoyed a little nibble of mum's crust then that was a bonus for him. You went above and beyond for that dear little bud, i don't think he would have made it as long as he did without your love a care. Like i said, we all beat ourselves up, im the worlds worst for brooding the what if's when i loose one . He chose when to go and that was a blessing, he fought a long fight and is at peace now, flying around over the bridge with his mate's in fields of millet. I always love that thought RIP dear Squawk, you will always be remembered by us all , another hug Jane x
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Apr 27, 2024 0:03:06 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 30, 2018 23:05:47 GMT
Thank you skysmum. Squawk has taught me so much about budgies, he was just so special. Because of his poor health he was always at the forefront of my mind whenever I bought anything bud related, even the other two here. I bought Beaky and Chirpy as companions and Impy to distract Chirpy so I could concentrate on Squawk. I know this sounds dramatic but I feel empty without him. No more driving to vets, researching the internet for him, getting his food/supplements ready every day. I can barely look at the other two budgies today not because I donโt care about them but they are enjoying the life Squawk should have had. Poor boy has been battling to stay alive since he was 5 months old. Nevertheless, Iโd rafher have had him than not and will always treasure the time we had.
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Post by Hezz on Dec 31, 2018 1:26:26 GMT
I am so sorry, Jane. Squawky is now at peace and pain-free. Fly high, little fella. xx
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Post by sweetpea on Dec 31, 2018 11:52:45 GMT
I am so sorry to hear this, Jane. I think Squawk started having health problems around the same time as my Bezukhov started having seizures, so I felt a connection at that point. With Bezukhov, I was constantly on the alert, listening for the 'seizure sound' so I could be there to nudge him out of it & I hated being away from him for this reason. I think when you have a bird that you are monitoring so closely, you can't help but be totally wrapped up in them. I really feel for you. Time is a great healer, & if anything, that space he occupies in your heart will just get bigger & bigger over time, as you remember all the good times. Fly high lovely Squawk. You were loved.
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Apr 27, 2024 0:03:06 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2018 12:07:47 GMT
Thank you sweetpea. I know what you mean by the heightened alert. I didnโt realise until he went yesterday how stressful itโs been for me, the constant worry and quest to keep him alive, looking at the bottom of the cage before lifting the blanket each morning and just hate going anywhere and leaving him to the point that Iโm praying Iโd win the lottery so i could stay at home lol Thatโs not to say that I would change a single thing as he deserved every effort that I gave him and I would do it all again. Iโm so glad that I picked him from all the others at the aviary as he gave me so much back.
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Apr 27, 2024 0:03:06 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2018 12:44:50 GMT
I just want to add that whilst Iโm getting a lot of credit on here for caring for Squawk I (we) couldnโt have done it without you guys on the forum. Iโve learned so much through you all and your support has keep me going these last few years. It would have been a very lonely place without you all and youโve all be so nice and are really helping me through this difficult time.
Thank you from me and Squawk to our lovely forum friends xxx
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Post by Shirls on Dec 31, 2018 14:17:10 GMT
These little birds Jane take up such a big space in our hearts. You know it will get better in time, you did nothing wrong and he loved you for that and that little piece of crust. When you go to work it will take your mind off the sadness you feel, so keep busy. Take care of yourself and keep your chin up. Thinking of you. Hugs.
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Apr 27, 2024 0:03:06 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Dec 31, 2018 18:53:07 GMT
Thank you Shirls and everyone whoโs posted. Iโve been out today shopping and managed to get through it without crying so it will get easier I know and work will help me keep occupied. Iโm going to bond with the other two as theyโve been sidelined especially Chirpy.
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Post by ffiscool on Dec 31, 2018 19:01:09 GMT
It will be hard but I hope the others keep you busy too, theyโll make you smile.
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Apr 27, 2024 0:03:06 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 1, 2019 9:20:23 GMT
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Oct 6, 2011 7:41:27 GMT
Marianne Marlow
Administrator
George, Daisy, Iris, Billy, Peter, Chipper, Dinku, Barney, Ayla and Rocky
Posts: 28,762
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Post by Marianne Marlow on Jan 1, 2019 9:27:25 GMT
Those are lovely photos Jane.
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Post by criswell on Jan 1, 2019 9:41:48 GMT
I'm so, so sorry Jane. The photos of Squawk are lovely and I'm pleased that you shared that lovely moment with him. You cared for Squawk amazingly well and he loved you. I was such a brave boy and you've been so brave taking care of him too. You had such a strong bond with him and that is a special thing to share. Hugs xxxx
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Apr 27, 2024 0:03:06 GMT
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Post by Deleted on Jan 1, 2019 11:13:57 GMT
We did have a strong bond, even the vet remarked on it when he fluttered from his carry box that day. I like to think that Squawk chose the way that he wanted to go, with me present and holding him, rather than with the vet taking charge.
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Post by criswell on Jan 1, 2019 11:22:53 GMT
I'm glad he had you there with him. I'm sure it was a comfort for him.
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Post by ffiscool on Jan 1, 2019 17:57:47 GMT
It may be too, that was his way of saying thanks, by taking the crust and letting you have that moment.
the fact you were with him at the end would have been very comforting.
When I lost my first boy many years ago, my biggest regret was that he was at the vet and not with me..
Squawk was very lucky boy having you.. he might not have made it so long otherwise.
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