Jane, i know we've spoken today but i had to acknowledge dear Squawks passing on here. No more beating yourself up about the bread, as you say he wasn't looking well before and if he enjoyed a little nibble of mum's crust then that was a bonus for him. You went above and beyond for that dear little bud, i don't think he would have made it as long as he did without your love a care. Like i said, we all beat ourselves up, im the worlds worst for brooding the what if's when i loose one .
He chose when to go and that was a blessing, he fought a long fight and is at peace now, flying around over the bridge with his mate's in fields of millet. I always love that thought
RIP dear Squawk, you will always be remembered by us all , another hug Jane x
Owned by Bailey and Iris
Also the boss, Frank Meep
RIP My Beautiful Jinny, Fern, Isla, Piper, Teddy, Freddy, Chilli Pepper, HRH Inca, Indi, Tinkerbell, George, Bertie, Bumble, Eve and my little superbud JoJo
Merryweather, Fauna, Summer, Betty, Joe and Flora Meep
Thank you skysmum. Squawk has taught me so much about budgies, he was just so special. Because of his poor health he was always at the forefront of my mind whenever I bought anything bud related, even the other two here. I bought Beaky and Chirpy as companions and Impy to distract Chirpy so I could concentrate on Squawk. I know this sounds dramatic but I feel empty without him. No more driving to vets, researching the internet for him, getting his food/supplements ready every day.
I can barely look at the other two budgies today not because I don’t care about them but they are enjoying the life Squawk should have had. Poor boy has been battling to stay alive since he was 5 months old. Nevertheless, I’d rafher have had him than not and will always treasure the time we had.
I think Squawk started having health problems around the same time as my Bezukhov started having seizures, so I felt a connection at that point. With Bezukhov, I was constantly on the alert, listening for the 'seizure sound' so I could be there to nudge him out of it & I hated being away from him for this reason. I think when you have a bird that you are monitoring so closely, you can't help but be totally wrapped up in them.
I really feel for you. Time is a great healer, & if anything, that space he occupies in your heart will just get bigger & bigger over time, as you remember all the good times.
Thank you sweetpea. I know what you mean by the heightened alert. I didn’t realise until he went yesterday how stressful it’s been for me, the constant worry and quest to keep him alive, looking at the bottom of the cage before lifting the blanket each morning and just hate going anywhere and leaving him to the point that I’m praying I’d win the lottery so i could stay at home lol
That’s not to say that I would change a single thing as he deserved every effort that I gave him and I would do it all again. I’m so glad that I picked him from all the others at the aviary as he gave me so much back.
I just want to add that whilst I’m getting a lot of credit on here for caring for Squawk I (we) couldn’t have done it without you guys on the forum. I’ve learned so much through you all and your support has keep me going these last few years. It would have been a very lonely place without you all and you’ve all be so nice and are really helping me through this difficult time.
Thank you from me and Squawk to our lovely forum friends xxx
These little birds Jane take up such a big space in our hearts. You know it will get better in time, you did nothing wrong and he loved you for that and that little piece of crust. When you go to work it will take your mind off the sadness you feel, so keep busy. Take care of yourself and keep your chin up. Thinking of you. Hugs.
Fly high: Billy Boy, Charlie, Harvey, JoJo, Joe, Lacey, Missy, Oscar, Pickle and Smudge. RIP: Penny, Poppy, Lola, Georgie, Bea, Morgana, Phoebe, Truffle, Hazel, Tilly, Tuppence and Mollie.
Thank you Shirls and everyone who’s posted. I’ve been out today shopping and managed to get through it without crying so it will get easier I know and work will help me keep occupied. I’m going to bond with the other two as they’ve been sidelined especially Chirpy.
I found these pictures of Squawk from a couple of years ago having some crust from me. He used to make a tweety sound and stare at me for some. This is the Squawk I saw on Saturday night. He saw my bread, made a tweet and came over to the bars waiting to be served. I had my old Squawk back for that minute, I thought he was improving and on the up. I’m glad I though I did make him happy. He literally had the teeniest amount so I think it was more about sharing and being nosy than wanting the bread.
I'm so, so sorry Jane. The photos of Squawk are lovely and I'm pleased that you shared that lovely moment with him. You cared for Squawk amazingly well and he loved you. I was such a brave boy and you've been so brave taking care of him too. You had such a strong bond with him and that is a special thing to share. Hugs xxxx
We did have a strong bond, even the vet remarked on it when he fluttered from his carry box that day. I like to think that Squawk chose the way that he wanted to go, with me present and holding him, rather than with the vet taking charge.